


Predictability is boring....

by Spamber



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek is a Tease, Inner Dialogue, M/M, My First Fanfic, No Smut, Not Beta Read, POV Stiles, Sarcasm, Sorry Not Sorry, Stiles is a Little Shit, Top Derek Hale, Virgin Stiles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-29
Updated: 2014-07-29
Packaged: 2018-02-10 23:32:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2044377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spamber/pseuds/Spamber
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or the ficlet where everyone is an asshole, there's pixies (again) and Stiles is tired of getting slammed into walls by a passive aggressive Sourwolf.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Predictability is boring....

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not a writer and this was written in 15 minutes due to my desire to see Derek responding to Stiles claims that he's becoming predictable. Please don't shoot me! Someone write me smut following this...

Stile's "friends" were assholes. Jackson, Lord of the Douche who has somehow managed to river dance his way back into Lydia's heart, is an asshole. Isaac 'who the hell wears scarves during summer anyway…fucking hipster werewolves who steal best friends, that's who' is an asshole. Scott, whose bond of friendship with Stiles once seemed as enduring as the epic love between Sam and Dean 'at least that's what he believed until actual Disney Princess Allison Argent showed up in Beacon Hills', was an asshole. Erica, who can't seem to decide if she wants to flirt with Stiles or threaten him 'ok and so maybe he missed the memo but even power hungry, sociopathic werewolves should be able to differentiate between the two', is an asshole. Boyd, well Boyd doesn't consider the two of them "friends" 'which, rude'. So yea, Boyd's an asshole too. Allison, actual Disney Princess and whose family may or may not be evil incarnate, is an asshole. Lydia, ok well so maybe Stiles is actually too genuinely terrified 'and ok so he may have had to change his 10 year plan to a 15 year plan but he hasn't given up on the love of his life' of Lydia to call her derogatory names,' even if she is kinda an asshole…sometimes…not that Stiles would ever admit that out loud...because seriously have you met Lydia?'. And Derek Hale, Creepy McCreeperson and thrice elected Mayor Creepville, is the biggest asshole of them all.

Upon further reflection of his social circle, Stiles has decided to ignore all research and pack responsibility for their latest big bad of the week 'and honestly it just had to be pixies again didn't it, always with the fucking pixie, they are such little shits' and lose himself in Twizzlers, Mountain Dew, and hours of Final Fantasy VII. After all, if anyone can make him forget about Lydia Martin, it's Tifa Lockhart 'and yea if he's perfectly honest with himself he's never been completely unaffected by Sephiroth's undeniable sex appeal…for a 2D character the guy is objectively hot, and damn if that doesn't remind him of another objectively hot anti-social lonewolf bent on self-destruction'. Which is why, when he arrives home and his cheek once again becomes intimately acquainted with his bedroom wall courtesy of one Mayor of Creepville himself, Stiles brain-to-mouth filter 'which is practically non-existent on a good day, and really he isn't as oblivious to his own character flaws as everyone seems to think he is' completely shuts down. What he means to tell Derek is that the threats don't really work if he and Derek are just going to keep saving each other's lives all the time. Maybe it is the fact that Stiles has begun to filter all the violence and adrenaline from supernatural shenanigans into sexual aggression. Maybe it's the fact that Stiles can't ignore the warm breath ghosting past his ear and sending a shiver down his spine or the solid wall of heat at his back. Maybe it's the fact that the hand at his throat seems more concerned with preventing a head injury than actually choking him. Or maybe it's just the simple fact that Derek Hale is hot like burning and Stiles enjoys pulling his metaphorical pigtails more than he enjoys hot curly fries fresh from the oil 'and everyone who's met him for 5 minutes understands his unshakeable devotion to curly fries'. So instead of trying to minimize the threat 'and honestly who does Derek think he's kidding at this point', what actually comes out of his mouth is, "See Sourwolf, now you're just becoming predictable."

"Predictable?" The low growl that accompanies Derek's question makes lust curl sharp and quick in Stile's belly. His dick goes from mildly interested twitches at the wall slamming to achingly hard faster than he can blink. Now understand, Stiles is fairly self-aware. He has always been openly curious about his own sexuality and anyone with eyes can see that Derek is objectively attractive. Between the body of a Greek God and a face that would probably make angels cry, it's easy to see why Derek has featured in one or two 'ok ok maybe more like a couple dozen' of Stiles' jerkoff fantasies. So the spike of arousal isn't really surprising to Stiles. And if his lower half sways subtly backwards when clawed hands sweep gently across his hips, well who can blame him really? Stiles is fully aware that Derek can smell the arousal coming off of him. So what he expects to happen is for Derek to pull back, either in confusion or disgust, and make some kind of flashy, werewolfy 'when you live in Beacon Hills werewolfy is a word ok' exit out the window while making some snarky remark about virgins and teenage hormones. Of course, when has his life ever actually gone like he expects it to? Which is why nothing could have prepared him for the way Derek slips a scorching hand just beneath the waistband of his jeans and playfully nips 'and hey if the mutts are going to nip like a damn puppy then they should really stop complaining about the dog jokes' at his ear. "Well I wouldn't want to be predictable." And when those surprisingly soft lips trace a scraping line of heat along his jaw to the tendon between neck and shoulder and Stiles feels the exquisitely painful bite of blunt, human teeth….well Stiles brain officially shuts down after that. And maybe that's a good thing, because what happens after that? Let's just say that Derek may have failed epically at being the Alpha, but he is exponentially more adept at deflowering virgins. And yea, Stiles' friends might be assholes, but Stiles is kind of an asshole too.


End file.
